Keeping Active

Max and his brother Mulligan
Mulligan was hit by a car after
we moved here.

I try each day to keep K active.  It is really hard to motivate him to do things.  The only exception is when he starts to do something compulsively - then it is impossible to stop him.  His latest compulsion is walking.  He walks down to where the sidewalk ends.  The sidewalk terminates at a opthalmologist office that has an American flag flying in the front.  He walks the 1/4 of a mile to the end, does a nice crisp about face, salutes the flag and returns home.  He does this 4 to 8 times a day.  He was dragging the poor dog with him, but I convinced him to leave the dog at home and enjoy his walk without that distraction.  Much better for the dog, Max.  Max is so confused by K.  Max is a timid little miniature Schnauzer - a bit of a nervous Nellie, so any change upsets him.  Of course, his nerves manifest in incessant barking that none of us enjoy.  We certainly have our fair share of change, so Max is noticeably leery of his formerly adored owner.  He still loves K and will spend hours sleeping on the couch on K's leg when K is watching TV, but isn't too sure when K is up pacing around.  Then Max hangs with me, sleeps wherever he can find me and pretends to be a dog.

We live on a busy street and two of the three schools dump traffic, walking and driving, on either side of our house.  K walks on the sidewalk that passes the football and soccer fields.  But, if there is anyone else on the sidewalk, he comes back to tell me he can't go because someone is out there, waits 30 seconds or so, then tries again.  Sometimes he comes in and out of the house 3 or 4 times before he is actually able to go for his walk.  When he comes back he tells me all about it - any cars that passed or people in the area, whether he saw our neighbors, or what our neighbors might be doing if he can't see them.  This is all fine.  I'm trying to walk with him a couple of times a day.

This week I thought might be a good time for him to start warming up for the golf season. He goes to one or another of the golf stores each day. That is to say, I drive him to the golf store, I wait in the car, he goes in for about 10 minutes and then I drive him home, usually stopping by the grocery store on the way back home. It's okay - kind of reminds me of all the times waiting while one or another of the kids to soccer, football, or softball practise, only a lot quicker. I've actually had some really enjoyable times in the parking lot at the golf shop!  I take my sketch pad with me and work on "zentangle."  One day this past week, a little bird sat on a branch outside my car window and serenaded me the whole time.  It was enough to make me want to bird watch!  I wanted to see if he was actually going to be able to play golf this summer with his friends and give him the opportunity to warm up for the season. K did pretty well. The weather has been record-breaking warm and I thought his golf buddies might be playing already. They make all their arrangements via email; I checked his email and nothing yet. I'm trying to get going to the range into his list of compulsive behaviors, but no luck yet.


I've also tried to get him to try yoga and tai chi;  Although he has enjoyed both at Alzheimer's, I just can't seem to get him to agree to give it a try.  I need these for myself.  I just have to make up my mind to go without him and get home health care to stay with him.  I know it shouldn't, but it seems like a kind of abandonment to leave him with a stranger in our home when he wants me to me here with him all the time.  I've got more work to do to get these kind of thoughts out of my mind so that I can take care of myself, so that I can take care of him.


This quote was in my daily inspirational email today:  "Compassion cures the ills of isolation with its consistent love and acceptance."  I am thankful for the compassion of others and pray God will give me compassion and patience in the role of caregiver.

Love and peace.  Mary